Sleep, Bad Route
by ShadowedSoulSpirit
Summary: Right before Aoba's final surgery, the changed Clear begins to cry. Why? The old Clear was crying inside of him; and this time, he refused to give up. Grappling for control for his body, Clear fights for one reason only: Aoba-san. And to do it, he must sing a special song—and not stop this time. Warnings Inside.


**Sleep, Bad Route**

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 **A DMMd story.**

 **Summary: Right before Aoba's final surgery, the changed Clear begins to cry. Why? The old Clear was crying inside of him; and this time, he refused to give up. Grappling for control for his body, Clear fights for one reason only: Aoba-san. And to do it, he must sing a special song—and not stop this time.**

 **Rating: T for sadness, death, spoilers, all that fun stuff. This was the bad path kiddos. Don't like it then don't read it.**

 **Note: This is a mixture of both the good and the bad route.**

* * *

 _Aoba-san… Forgive me…_

 _Forgive me._

 _Please._

 _I'm so sorry… so so sorry…. I didn't mean it. I never meant it. You're my master. I never want to cause you harm._ But…

 _But look at you… maimed... by me._ I cut off your legs, your arms, and your life. I wanted to be with you, yet I took everything away that was you.

 _I'm sorry…_

But I can't stop it.

"That's odd…" _It's not me Aoba-san. I swear. Please, believe me…_ "Why am I crying…?"

Because I want out. I want to save you. I want to save you with my entire being, but I feel like I'm pounding on a cage. I can't get out.

I can't save you.

"Hey… Aoba-san…"

I can feel what he feels—the other me. I know it's me that's crying, the subconscious kiss I feel sliding down my cheek, and yet he's feeling it too, my tears through his eyes dripping onto the sheet that wrapped Aoba-san. I want to talk. My throat so badly aches to talk, to tell Aoba-san I'm so sorry…

But this is all I get in the form of control. I've taken a back seat to my body, and I'm just the baggage coming along for the ride.

I guess it's a good thing.

I get to suffer like Aoba-san, just like I deserve.

"Why am I crying..?"

Because I love him; and yet I'm worthless. I couldn't save him once, I couldn't save him again.

 _Maybe I should stop here._

Through his eyes I stare down at Aoba-san's trembling face, the way his lips twitch knowingly and his head tilts away from the hand reaching out to him.

 _Maybe I should stop and rest._

By the way his eyebrows bend, I can tell he is cringing from the hand that slid through his hair; the hand that was once mine.

The one that touched Aoba-san tenderly, lovingly. I think back to the hand that touched my face, the way mine fit right over it; I can still trace the way our faces were the same.

" _Your face is like mine…"_

He cries harder the more I think such despairing thoughts.

"Why..? Why…?"

Aoba-san would not answer, and this angers him. Rather roughly, he releases Aoba-san, going for a scalpel. Aoba-san sucks in a sharp breath.

 _No._

I can't stop.

I can't rest.

I have to save Aoba-san.

Fighting against myself was like kicking at black sludge. My subconscious body was weak, and when he willed it, I would stop fighting all together. But I don't care. I'm not stopping, not until I save Aoba-san!

"What..?" He grunts and drops the scalpel on the table. He knows I'm awake now, and when he tries to subdue me as Toue instructed, I fight back.

 _You're not taking any more away from Aoba-san!_

For a moment, his arm twitched—no, my arm twitched—and I knew it was possible for me to take back control. I know a word for this.

Mutiny.

 _I won't let you hurt Aoba-san anymore! So leave him alone!_

"What's happening..?"

Aoba-san perks up as I pull back my hand, and my body responds.

"Stop this, right now."

I wasn't a program. Aoba-san said I was like a human; and like any human, you can override their subconscious. There was one thing Toue couldn't take away, and that's what Grandpa gave to me—what it was like to be a human.

"Give—enough—my—body—stop!"

His voice was short circuiting, unable to take the amount of input I was putting in. I was like a human, although I was made of machine parts. That's the glory of it; I know just how to make myself break.

I stretch my hand for the scalpel. He tries to stop me, but it's like I fitted my hand into a glove. This arm was mine. At the sound of the metal scrapping, Aoba-san tenses; but I'm not going to hurt him anymore.

"Stop! What are you doing..?!"

The last time I tried to do this, the struggle didn't last long. Toue had been in the room and ordered the Alphas to have him fixed and lock me out. But now it's just me and him, an original against a fake. One thing kept me behind this cage.

The new key lock.

"Stop—Aoba-san—Toue!—I'll save you."

It feels like something rammed into my subconscious, throwing me back. The key lock was tightening it's control, trying to keep out. I wouldn't stop. I wouldn't.

 _Aoba-san!_

I had done it once, and I could do it again. With control of my right arm, I lift the scalpel. My arm twitches and shakes as I fight against him, trying to maintain my control. I feel it slipping out of my grasp, just like the scalpel was, each of my fingers unhooking at his will.

"Aoba-san… needs me..!"

 _All you do is hurt him!_ If I had a voice, it would be screaming into the abyss. _I won't give up this time!_

Two fingers keep a firm grip on the scalpel. There was just one more motion, to jerk my arm up and seize control—but my shoulders wouldn't lift.

 _No!_

"Haha… There's some cracks… but it can be fixed."

He knows he's not me. He knows we are two different people, yet he thinks he was the Clear made for Aoba-san. He's programed to think it's his mission.

He's acknowledged me before, as a bug Toue said. I'm nothing but a virus they are unable to completely remove.

I struggle to get the arm to move without the shoulder, but it was no use; if I couldn't move it, then I wouldn't have enough force to stab through the keylock.

I stare down at Aoba-san, the way he strains from want to sit up, the way he gulps quietly. Beneath the sheet, I know he lacks arms, legs, eyes, because of this body. I don't care if Aoba-san never wants to see me again, I will save him!

But no matter how strong my will was, I couldn't. I just couldn't.

 _I'm so sorry..._

 _He_ shakes his head, and I feel the control slipping from the arm. He was winning.

I guess I really can't save Aoba-san…

"C….cl…ear…"

If there was a window, I would be plastered on it. No matter how hoarse, how broken, how quiet, I could never mistaken the voice of Aoba-san. _He_ thinks he's calling out his name, and before he can open his mouth to reassure him, Aoba-san says something else.

"S….sing…"

The Jellyfish song.

 _He_ was programmed to forget it; but I'm not. I could never forget that song.

But will it work?

The doubt lingers from the fight with the Alphas. It didn't work the first time, so there is no guarantee it will work.

But.

But I will try. Aoba-san wants me to, so I will try.

I give up fighting for the arm. He flexes it once I do, making sure it was really himself causing the movements. He shakes his head again, like he can rattle me out.

I will save Aoba-san.

 _Sway, sway…_

I have no voice, but I know it's surging in his head. He's always heard what I thought, so this is no different.

 _Swaying between the waves…_

He holds onto his head tightly, like he could block out what he was hearing. I sensed I was gaining strength. I couldn't stop now. Not this time.

 _Sparkle, sparkle, sparkling, their voices drift into the distan_ —

"Gahhh!"

I falter.

"C…clear…"

Aoba-san.

The lyrics surge through me. I don't stop.

 _The dreaming jellyfish sing their song and sleep on the gentle shore._

I could feel myself gaining control of the upper body, and when he roars again in agony, I shove the scalpel as deep as I can right behind the eye socket.

 _Snap!_

Right through the key lock.

I wasn't standing in a third person perspective, viewing the events through a television screen; at that moment, I was thrusted right back into my own skin, everything in my control once again. For a few seconds, my vision falters, before the vision to my right eye cuts off.

It was just like before, only I didn't stop. I kept singing.

Shakenly, I release the scalpel. I felt like a new born baby in my body, trying to remember what mechanisms make my head turn and my legs walk. I pant and clutch the table, holding on tightly when the pain shoots through my sensors.

It was okay.

It was okay because I could feel it, not feel it through him.

"Aoba..san…" My voice. Me, unimpeded, saying his name.

Aoba-san could tell there was a difference; he knew he wasn't talking to him anymore. It hurt so badly, but it hurt worse to watch his lips tremble as he opens his mouth.

"…Cle…ar…"

There's so many things I want to say. I love you. I'm going to save you. But none of those came. Instead, in a choked voice, I can only find the words to say.

"I'm sorry…."

It was my body that took away everything. It was these hands that hurt him. I know it wasn't me that truly did it—but I gave up. I'm just as responsible.

I fumble around a little, tripping a few times. My depth perception is a obliterated; and it's not long before I ram my side into the table unknowingly. I wouldn't know for sure how many abilities Toue took away from me, but that was for me to find out later.

I didn't know how much time I had to be in control of my body.

As gently as I could, I lift Aoba-san up. It's sickening to imagine how much weight limbs seem to have when they are gone. Holding his frail, broken body close to my chest, I say it again.

"I'm sorry…"

A Blood-like substance and oil seeps down the side of my face. I have no idea how much damage the scalpel could have caused. I might have failed to even fully break the key lock; and if that's so, he can assume control once he collects his strength again.

I have to hurry.

One time, Grandpa found a litter of puppies. A real litter, not Allmates or manmade construction. I picked one up and held it in my hands. That's how Aoba-san felt—as light as a newborn. Because of me.

No one seems to be around, or at least the security thought nothing of me as I waltz down the corridor, carrying Aoba-san in such a mad rush that I probably looked like a maniac. I didn't stop, not until I get to the elevator and slam my elbow into the button of the lowest floor.

I have to get Aoba-san somewhere safe. Tae-san's house would be the best place, but just thinking about it makes my throat tighten. What will she say, when I bring her grandson home like this?

She'd want to kill me.

"I'm sorry…" I whisper, as we shiver to the first floor. I don't go out the main entrance. No, I go out a back way, just as if I was trotting behind grandpa once again. He had a secret route to get me to safety, and I still could remember it. I follow it diligently, walking as fast as I could until—

A shock runs down my spine.

He was awake.

The key lock wasn't broken.

I break out into a full sprint.

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry…" I say to every whimper Aoba-san makes. I know if he could, he would be gripping onto me tightly. "I'm sorry… I have to get you to Tae-san..."

I couldn't imagine what he was thinking. I mean, after I did all of this to him, I suddenly was able to seize control and take him from that place? I can imagine he hates me. Hates me very much.

But right now, that doesn't matter. I will bare all the hate Aoba-san will have for me; as long as I can see him safe. That's a good tradeoff for me.

Another shock jolts me from my thoughts, hardening my attention on one thing only: escape.

I must have hit other things again; my sensors couldn't process the extent of the damage. However, I could feel the creaks, and the tears of circuits and wires, and metal bridges bending and breaking. At this rate, I was going to fall apart.

But falling apart was better than letting _him_ free.

I manage to make it to the Northern District before I feel another shock. I stumble, but manage to catch myself, holding onto Aoba-san a little tighter. Can't stop to recuperate, so I keep moving, the stinging pain flooding my mechanisms with something worthy of a scream.

I retrace our steps back to where we fled for our lives—back before the nightmare—and soon, familiar territories begin to settle into place. I couldn't help for a moment but to wonder why I wasn't being chased.

As a result, another shock slaps me.

"Gah!"

He was trying more frequently to yank the controls away from me. It hurt so badly, and it doesn't help that I stumble to make sense of the world with just one eye, often bumping into walls or hitting trashcans in my haste.

I couldn't stop. Couldn't.

Not now. Not after everything.

I march on.

All this time, I haven't looked at Aoba-san, the small form wrapped in the blanket, and I still couldn't, especially as I approached the outline of his house.

There was a figure already waiting, and before I could process who it was, the controls were yanked away from me.

No!

I'm thrust back into my third person view. He drops Aoba-san as he feels the pain I inflicted on my head. I grapple to shove him back, but we are equals. He wouldn't give much, and I couldn't take much as the figure keeping vigilance rushes over.

"Aoba!" Koujaku.

I switch my tactics, ripping the control from him of one thing.

"Please! Help Aoba-san-!" It was all I could manage before I am shoved back. I couldn't sing the song again. It would only be a matter of time before he would just dominate my body again and bring more harm to Aoba-san.

"No, Aoba-san is mine!" He growls.

I still fight, to give them time, but Koujaku refuses to move; and I know why.

When he dropped Aoba-san, the sheet fell off too.

At that moment, Tae-san hobbles out, followed by a scowling Noiz. He must have stayed for Aoba-san.

"Aoba!" Tae-san rushes as quickly as she can to Aoba's side, reeling back in horror at the sight that meets her.

I can feel the circuits cutting off in his legs, bringing him to his knees. We are breaking, but I don't care. Aoba-san was safe now. Aoba-san was safe now.

Before my processors could manage it, there was a fist in the right side of my face that launches me into the dirt. Noiz.

But it was just enough force to jar _him_ out and fit me back in.

I blink and try to push myself up. One arm sluggishly receives the input, propping me up enough to see Aoba-san in Tae-san's arms. She was talking to him, but I have no idea what she is clearly saying. Noiz busted out the hearing in my right ear.

"What the hell did you do to Aoba you bastard…" Koujaku demands, drawing out his sword. Noiz tches him.

"It's obvious what he did." He looks down at me, planting a foot on the side of my head so he could smash me against the ground. "The question is what should we do to him."

Anything, I wanted to say. Anything, because Aoba-san was safe. But I couldn't. Not when Aoba-san so tenderly says, "Cl..Clear…"

I smile sadly. I know it's the end. I don't need sensors for that.

"It's okay, Aoba-san. I'm so sorry that I hurt you. I promise I won't be around to hurt you anymore." Noiz puts more pressure, causing some of the functions to short circuit momentarily. "I promise… I'm so glad you're safe now… I love you…"

Koujaku is angered by my comment, because in the next moment I feel his sword through my back. The circuits to my legs are completely severed, and I can't help but gasp. Aoba-san trembles.

 _No don't be scared Aoba-san… It's okay. It's okay._

I don't know how to comfort him, for all the things I've done. I have no way to make it right. But I know there is one thing that makes me feel better. Slowly, I open my mouth, my reactors struggling with the input.

"Sway, sway, swaying, a ray of light..." I sing slowly. I know it doesn't sound the same, but I still gauge Aoba-san's reaction, making sure he's okay. "Sparkle, sparkle, sparkling—gah…" The sword travels farther up my back, stopping me mid-song.

But the moment I stop, Aoba-san's trembles start again. I can't stop.

"No matter when, as long as this song echoes out… In many colors, they hang in the clear sky…"

It hurts so badly; the sword, _him_ , Noiz. But I keep going. I keep going for Aoba-san, until the last verse falls from my lips, and realization settles in.

"Aoba-san… I'm sorry…" I smile a bitter smile, knowing he will never see it again. Noiz lifts his foot from my head.

"I forgot Ren-san…."

I hear the crunch of the foot coming back down, and I fall apart.

 _I'm sorry Aoba-san._

 _I failed you._

But.

 **I love you.**

 _The dreaming jellyfish sing their song and sleep on the gentle shore_ …

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 **I thought about writing a sequel about Aoba recuperating. Thoughts?**

 **Clear was my absolute favorite. I had no experience with DMMd, so I got the bad ending on his route the first time I played. That was sooo fun.**

 **-Soul Spirit-**


End file.
